"Silence is a source of great strength." Lao-Tzu
"If speaking is silver, then listening is gold." Turkish Proverb
"You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time." Scott M. Peck
"Who speaks, sows; Who listens, reaps." Argentine Proverb
There are many ways to say it...there is great power in listening. There is power in listening in a conversation, truly listening not thinking of what to say next, but being fully present to what someone is sharing, whether it is a family member, friend or co-worker. I daily find myself asking "what did you say" or "could you repeat that". The skill of listening is truly that a skill, one that requires attention and constant practice. Challenge yourself today to listen a little deeper and see what your world reveals.
There is also power in listening to oneself, whether journaling, meditating, praying out loud, heck I have even audio recorded myself just talking off the cuff on a thought. When we really listen to ourselves we can really understand and know what we believe, not from an intellectual space, but what is deep below the surface in our subconscious. Create some sort of space for yourself this week a couple of times to listen to yourself, meditate and do your best not to edit what you think, just listen and observe your thoughts. Take 5 minutes to journal on "The greatest joy in my life right now is..." and see what comes to light.
Find somone to partner with and ask them to share something dear to their heart, you could have them share from the statement above "The greatest joy in my life right now is..." and really listen. When they are complete, reflect back to them what you heard and listen again to their feedback on your listening ability. There is nothing right or wrong about this practice, it is simply an awareness exercise.
One of the greatest gifts anyone can give another is the gift of listening. I truly believe that is one of the gifts I am called to give in my counseling practice. Give yourself the gift of being heard and book a session with me today!
Love, Light & Laughter,
Darrell
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Faith makes you whole!
"If you
limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you
disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a
compromise." - Robert Fritz
I am humbled by this quote, for it brings me to the realization how many times I have limited myself by what seems possible or reasonable. It brings to mind the idea of faith.
Here is Ernest Holmes' definition of faith in the glossary of The Science of Mind:
"Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Faith is a mental attitude, so inwardly embodied that the mind can no longer deny it. Faith is complete when it is both a conscious and subjective acceptance. Faith may be consciously generated. In spiritual terminology, faith means a belief in the presence of an invisible principle and law which directly and specifically responds to us. "Thy faith has made thee whole."
Our faith makes us whole, when we breathe and even consider beyond that which we know is possible or reasonable we are made whole and full. All of a sudden we are in alignment with the full possibility of life. Regardless of how I have chosen in the past, I choose today to consider beyond what I think is possible.
One of my favorite philosophers Heraclitus said "Unless you expect the unexpected you will never find [truth], for it is hard to discover and hard to attain."
Are you willing to expect the unexpected? I am, but I realize I have to reconnect with this intention everyday.
Let us expect the unexpected and see what reveals through our lives yes?
I would love to hear any testimonies of any unexpected realization and revelations as a result.
Share at darrelljonesspirit@gmail.com or reply to this post!
Love, Light & Laughter,
Darrell
I am humbled by this quote, for it brings me to the realization how many times I have limited myself by what seems possible or reasonable. It brings to mind the idea of faith.
Here is Ernest Holmes' definition of faith in the glossary of The Science of Mind:
"Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Faith is a mental attitude, so inwardly embodied that the mind can no longer deny it. Faith is complete when it is both a conscious and subjective acceptance. Faith may be consciously generated. In spiritual terminology, faith means a belief in the presence of an invisible principle and law which directly and specifically responds to us. "Thy faith has made thee whole."
Our faith makes us whole, when we breathe and even consider beyond that which we know is possible or reasonable we are made whole and full. All of a sudden we are in alignment with the full possibility of life. Regardless of how I have chosen in the past, I choose today to consider beyond what I think is possible.
One of my favorite philosophers Heraclitus said "Unless you expect the unexpected you will never find [truth], for it is hard to discover and hard to attain."
Are you willing to expect the unexpected? I am, but I realize I have to reconnect with this intention everyday.
Let us expect the unexpected and see what reveals through our lives yes?
I would love to hear any testimonies of any unexpected realization and revelations as a result.
Share at darrelljonesspirit@gmail.com or reply to this post!
Love, Light & Laughter,
Darrell
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Transition, Change, Uncertainty & Fear
Tomorrow, I end the part time job I have had for the past year while finishing my grad school program. Friday I get on a plane and head to Denver for the graduation ceremony from my program. I return next week to start a whole new job on Wednesday, all the while continuing to prepare for my oral panels to become a licensed minister in August...so in the midst of all this transition, change and uncertainty, guess who came by to visit...fear. One of the greatest joys for me right now having finished my studies, is to read books that have been waiting for me on my bookshelf that weren't directly related to my coursework and reread some of my old standbys. One of them is Ram Dass' "Journey of Awakening". Here is a quote from Krishnamurti
For the past 80 days or so, I have also been meditating everyday and I know that has aided me in staying calm in the midst of uncertainty and constant change. Meditating has created a space for me to be with my fear and learn about it and from it. Meditation has created a space for fear to be okay. Meditating has allowed me to sit with the question, is this fear or concern real or is it something just in my mind? It has liberated me from the immobilization that fear can hold me in.
Meditation has supported me in my living in so many ways, right now I am grateful for the way meditation holds me in moments of uncertainty and fear.
Start your own personal meditation marathon. Do 2 minutes a day everyday this summer until September 1st. Want support on how to do that?
Drop me a line @ darrelljonesspirit@gmail.com.
Love, Light & Laughter,
Darrell
It is not that you must be free from fear. The moment you try to free yourself from fear, you create a resistance against fear. What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it, not how to resist it through courage and so on.I don't fear that anything bad will happen to me, but I am aware of some anxiety around the unknown. How many hours will I really work, how will I juggle this with that. Will I get everything done I want to before I start my job. Will I forget to "close" anything up with my old work? How will the plans I have made for trips and vacations work out with my new work schedule...oh shoot, I scheduled a lunch meeting months ago for a week from now with a colleague, will I be able to keep that meeting or have to reschedule, the list can go on and on.
For the past 80 days or so, I have also been meditating everyday and I know that has aided me in staying calm in the midst of uncertainty and constant change. Meditating has created a space for me to be with my fear and learn about it and from it. Meditation has created a space for fear to be okay. Meditating has allowed me to sit with the question, is this fear or concern real or is it something just in my mind? It has liberated me from the immobilization that fear can hold me in.
Meditation has supported me in my living in so many ways, right now I am grateful for the way meditation holds me in moments of uncertainty and fear.
Start your own personal meditation marathon. Do 2 minutes a day everyday this summer until September 1st. Want support on how to do that?
Drop me a line @ darrelljonesspirit@gmail.com.
Love, Light & Laughter,
Darrell
Friday, March 23, 2012
The Work of Attention
The title of this post comes out of The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck, M.D. This book was the catalyst to me becoming more aware of who I am, and how my life is shaped by my thoughts, habits, beliefs and choices and regardless of how those thoughts, habits and beliefs formed, I became empowered to choose. I realized I could choose those thoughts, habits and beliefs to be my reality or choose something different. I am forever grateful for my father giving me this book early in my college years, it started me on a road to self discovery that has been and continues to be amazing.
I have made a personal commitment of meditating everyday, my own personal meditation marathon if you will. In The Road Less Traveled, Peck writes, "The principal form that the work of love takes is attention. When we love another we give him or her our attention; we attend to that person's growth. When we love ourselves we attend to our own growth. When we attend to someone we are caring for that person. The act of attending requires that we make the effort to set aside our existing preoccupations and actively shift our consciousness. Attention is an act of will, or work against the inertia of our own minds." He goes on to say, "By far the most common and important way in which we can exercise our attention is by listening."
This listening can take place in conversation with anyone, but in relationship to spiritual practice and meditation, this listening is all in relation to ourselves. In meditation, we are giving attention to or loving ourselves. It doesn't mean we stop thinking necessarily (actually I have only had a few moments of close to nothingness in all my years of meditating), rather in meditation we are giving ourselves full attention, we are as Peck states it working "against the inertia of our own minds." Instead of our thoughts, beliefs, habits and feelings barreling forward out of control and reacting to whatever presents itself, we take a few moments to breathe and observe, we listen to ourselves. In this attentive listening we come face to face to what is running the show, our thoughts, habits and beliefs. The point is not to push anything away or stop these thoughts, habits and beliefs, rather for me the point of meditating is to become aware of them so I can choose them consciously or put my attention elsewhere.
The whole reason I started this mediation marathon was due to the act of meditating. I was getting ready a few weeks ago for class in a hotel room that I was sharing with another classmate, we had big presentations that day to get ready for and not much time to get ready for class, but there he was sitting in meditation, that came first before he did anything else. (thanks Andrew) I sat down right there with him and meditated for a few moments and found peace for a few minutes, but as I got up from the meditation, that peace sustained. I meditate on a regular basis, but became aware that morning that it was time for me to move and stretch even more, so every morning before I leave the house I meditate. My goal is a minimum of 5 minutes. I want nothing but success for myself. I often do a bit longer, but 5 minutes is doable everyday, regardless of what my "to do" list for the day has on it.
I have found and continue to discover greater levels of understanding, insight, inspiration, peace and love for myself and others through meditation. To me meditation is a practice for life. It costs nothing, but rewards me with everything! Join me and give yourself the gift everyday of meditating. Start wherever you are, 2 minutes, 3, 4, 5 or more. The goal is not quantity, the goal is quality and consistency. (BTW, I mean sitting still with your eyes closed or fixed on a candle and doing nothing else, not standing in the shower, sitting in the tub, meditating while you brush your hair or teeth, yes you can mediate doing anything, but there is something particular to being still in our bodies even though our mind may choose to "monkey" around as they say.)
Email me with how your practice is going, I would love to hear. I am also excited to entertain any questions you may have about meditation.
Love, Light & Laughter - Darrell
I have made a personal commitment of meditating everyday, my own personal meditation marathon if you will. In The Road Less Traveled, Peck writes, "The principal form that the work of love takes is attention. When we love another we give him or her our attention; we attend to that person's growth. When we love ourselves we attend to our own growth. When we attend to someone we are caring for that person. The act of attending requires that we make the effort to set aside our existing preoccupations and actively shift our consciousness. Attention is an act of will, or work against the inertia of our own minds." He goes on to say, "By far the most common and important way in which we can exercise our attention is by listening."
This listening can take place in conversation with anyone, but in relationship to spiritual practice and meditation, this listening is all in relation to ourselves. In meditation, we are giving attention to or loving ourselves. It doesn't mean we stop thinking necessarily (actually I have only had a few moments of close to nothingness in all my years of meditating), rather in meditation we are giving ourselves full attention, we are as Peck states it working "against the inertia of our own minds." Instead of our thoughts, beliefs, habits and feelings barreling forward out of control and reacting to whatever presents itself, we take a few moments to breathe and observe, we listen to ourselves. In this attentive listening we come face to face to what is running the show, our thoughts, habits and beliefs. The point is not to push anything away or stop these thoughts, habits and beliefs, rather for me the point of meditating is to become aware of them so I can choose them consciously or put my attention elsewhere.
The whole reason I started this mediation marathon was due to the act of meditating. I was getting ready a few weeks ago for class in a hotel room that I was sharing with another classmate, we had big presentations that day to get ready for and not much time to get ready for class, but there he was sitting in meditation, that came first before he did anything else. (thanks Andrew) I sat down right there with him and meditated for a few moments and found peace for a few minutes, but as I got up from the meditation, that peace sustained. I meditate on a regular basis, but became aware that morning that it was time for me to move and stretch even more, so every morning before I leave the house I meditate. My goal is a minimum of 5 minutes. I want nothing but success for myself. I often do a bit longer, but 5 minutes is doable everyday, regardless of what my "to do" list for the day has on it.
I have found and continue to discover greater levels of understanding, insight, inspiration, peace and love for myself and others through meditation. To me meditation is a practice for life. It costs nothing, but rewards me with everything! Join me and give yourself the gift everyday of meditating. Start wherever you are, 2 minutes, 3, 4, 5 or more. The goal is not quantity, the goal is quality and consistency. (BTW, I mean sitting still with your eyes closed or fixed on a candle and doing nothing else, not standing in the shower, sitting in the tub, meditating while you brush your hair or teeth, yes you can mediate doing anything, but there is something particular to being still in our bodies even though our mind may choose to "monkey" around as they say.)
Email me with how your practice is going, I would love to hear. I am also excited to entertain any questions you may have about meditation.
Love, Light & Laughter - Darrell
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
"Trust Love, trust love, trust God that love is everywhere,
That we are here to be the perfect givers of love and receivers of love
And love will have the final word." - Rickie Byars Beckwith
This is one of my favorite lyrics of Rickie BB. We are here to be givers and receivers of love AND what if the giving and receiving started within ourselves? Yes this song speaks to all of our relationships, we are here to give and receive love to and from our family, friends, children, lovers, spouses and partners, but can we consider ourselves in this giving and receiving? One of the basic principles of new thought philosophy, spiritual psychology and empowerment practices is that we can do, be or give to another only that which we can do, be or give to ourselves.
So on Valentine's day we collectively look outside ourselves to give and receive love, this is not a bad thing, I am just challenging myself today and invite you to join me in practicing self love, giving myself the love first, so I may be that much more of a better lover in the world. Ask yourself the question today, how could I expand my love of self today? This is not an ego stroke exercise of saying I look good, or I am a good so and so, this is an exercise of unconditional self-love. Regardless of what you have or don't have, love yourself today, regardless of what your relationships look like or don't look like, love yourself today. Regardless of the conditions of your life are you willing to unconditionally love the expression of Spirit/God/the Universe that you are?
Trust love, because love, loves to love. It doesn't know how to do anything else! As Rickie BB states, we are here to be the perfect givers and receivers of love. If we truly embrace this idea, love WILL have the final word. And so it is!
Darrell
That we are here to be the perfect givers of love and receivers of love
And love will have the final word." - Rickie Byars Beckwith
This is one of my favorite lyrics of Rickie BB. We are here to be givers and receivers of love AND what if the giving and receiving started within ourselves? Yes this song speaks to all of our relationships, we are here to give and receive love to and from our family, friends, children, lovers, spouses and partners, but can we consider ourselves in this giving and receiving? One of the basic principles of new thought philosophy, spiritual psychology and empowerment practices is that we can do, be or give to another only that which we can do, be or give to ourselves.
So on Valentine's day we collectively look outside ourselves to give and receive love, this is not a bad thing, I am just challenging myself today and invite you to join me in practicing self love, giving myself the love first, so I may be that much more of a better lover in the world. Ask yourself the question today, how could I expand my love of self today? This is not an ego stroke exercise of saying I look good, or I am a good so and so, this is an exercise of unconditional self-love. Regardless of what you have or don't have, love yourself today, regardless of what your relationships look like or don't look like, love yourself today. Regardless of the conditions of your life are you willing to unconditionally love the expression of Spirit/God/the Universe that you are?
Trust love, because love, loves to love. It doesn't know how to do anything else! As Rickie BB states, we are here to be the perfect givers and receivers of love. If we truly embrace this idea, love WILL have the final word. And so it is!
Darrell
Friday, January 27, 2012
Can you be alone with yourself?
Came across this again...The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer, enjoy.
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it, or fade it, or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand at the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, 'Yes.'
It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.
Monday, December 26, 2011
As One Door Closes Another Opens
As 2011 comes to a close and 2012 begins to open up this week, where are your thoughts? I typically sit in this week looking back over the year of accomplishments and failures and can find myself "rating" my year based on if there are more checks on the failure or accomplishment side. What I have learned to be true however, is that the worth of my year is not determined by a tally sheet. It is determined by my thinking and beliefs. If I believe I had a crappy year, then I had....a crappy year. If I believe I had a good year, then I had a....good year. What is challenging here is the dichotomy of good and bad, as if those are the only two options a year can be. Where I move my thoughts to now on a more regular basis is that my years, all of them, the one just past to 5 years ago to the one upcoming are years of growth and opportunity for expansion.
So sitting on the cusp of the new year I get excited about one of my favorite spiritual practices, Visioning. I started Visioning over 8 years ago and make it a regular practice throughout the year, but always make time for it as one year closes and another year begins.
Simply, Visioning is a type of meditation, where one becomes still and surrenders trying to "figure" anything out and ask 4 questions and see what reveals. These questions are directed more to our heart, soul and spirit than our intellectual mind. Rev. Michael Bernard Beckwith starting teaching this technique decades ago and calls it "reverent listening". In Visioning our only purpose is to listen with our inner ear to what the voice of our spirit has to share. Join me this year is Visioning as opposed to resolving. It is truly a powerful way to move into the New Year.
There are many opportunities to be led in Visioning. I lead a weekly Visioning group Wednesday mornings at 8:30 a.m., I will be facilitating an evening Visioning and Vision Boarding process on Wednesday, January 11th at Be Optimal Holistic Center. My colleague and dear friend Sara Connell will be leading a Visioning workshop as well at the Bodhi Spiritual Center on January 8th.
Feel free to contact me with questions. I can also send you instruction to facilitate your own Visioning process. Happy New Year!
Love, Light & Laughter,
Darrell
darrelljonesspirit@gmail.com
So sitting on the cusp of the new year I get excited about one of my favorite spiritual practices, Visioning. I started Visioning over 8 years ago and make it a regular practice throughout the year, but always make time for it as one year closes and another year begins.
Simply, Visioning is a type of meditation, where one becomes still and surrenders trying to "figure" anything out and ask 4 questions and see what reveals. These questions are directed more to our heart, soul and spirit than our intellectual mind. Rev. Michael Bernard Beckwith starting teaching this technique decades ago and calls it "reverent listening". In Visioning our only purpose is to listen with our inner ear to what the voice of our spirit has to share. Join me this year is Visioning as opposed to resolving. It is truly a powerful way to move into the New Year.
There are many opportunities to be led in Visioning. I lead a weekly Visioning group Wednesday mornings at 8:30 a.m., I will be facilitating an evening Visioning and Vision Boarding process on Wednesday, January 11th at Be Optimal Holistic Center. My colleague and dear friend Sara Connell will be leading a Visioning workshop as well at the Bodhi Spiritual Center on January 8th.
Feel free to contact me with questions. I can also send you instruction to facilitate your own Visioning process. Happy New Year!
Love, Light & Laughter,
Darrell
darrelljonesspirit@gmail.com
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